Self awareness is one of several characteristics that leaders want to see in the people they lead.
What is so valuable about being in tune of your interpersonal skills and quirks, and your strengths, and weaknesses? Some are oblivious, while others are spot on!
Some claim being “honest” or “real” is the best way to approach life and yet there are times when their honesty resembles rudeness. Perhaps there is a lack of compassion, but more than likely their self awareness is in short supply.
One of the more common negative cycles of behavior is tagged as passive aggressive. The passive aggressive person often lives in a cloud of unawareness and responds to uncomfortable situations with humor that serves as a mask to their anger and frustration.
“Self awareness” of one’s emotions and thoughts requires continual attention to the gauges on the dashboard of their heart. Much like the driver behind the wheel is, or should be, he is scanning his mirrors, peripherals and gauges while at the same time remaining focused on the road ahead. Self awareness is that habit of surveying your surroundings, making appropriate adjustments while continuing down this road of life. Here are some tips that I’ve observed in the self aware.
1. They take time to reflect. Many very busy leaders take time each day or week to simply think. Designate some time this week, find a good “thinking chair” and just think. Maybe your best time to reflect will be when your running shoes are laced up and you’re pounding out a few miles in the neighborhood. Spend 15 minutes thinking about the conversations you had this week. Ask yourself some hard questions. Dig deep. Think.
2. Spend time reading. Read books, articles, blogs about communication, emotions and people with whom you consider successful. What resonates with you? What challenges you? What moves you?
3. Take on a project. By a project, I mean a person. We gravitate towards commonality but try stepping out of your circle and invite someone “different” into your world. Choose someone that challenges you intellectually, emotionally or otherwise. Gauge your emotions, thoughts, speech and body language while you are with that person.
4. Finally, ask for feedback. Ask a trusted friend to give you some honest feedback. Hopefully, you have someone in your life that you allow to speak straight to you. Ask them to monitor your behavior at times and point out some things that will help you improve your interpersonal skills as well emotional health.
Self awareness is a key to enriched relationships. Open your eyes and your heart! What are the gauges telling you?